The Adventures of DrWaffle
by Tetsuorocks
Summary: Dr.WAffle does wierd stuff
1. CHAPTER1

This is my first Fanfiction story thingy. I don't own any brand name included in this stupid thing I'm writing. Except for Dr. Waffle, I trademarked that!  
  
It began simply enough at 12:45 pm in the High-School cafeteria, and the biggest annoyance in the world, Mohammed K. went up to the vending machine to get some waffles. He inserts his .75 cents and this is where the story takes on!  
  
Mohammed- Oh! WAFFLES I like waffles!...F.... 3... What the!  
  
Mohammed- Stupid machine!  
  
Machine voice- No you are stupid ha ha ha . feel my wrath ha ha CREAKK CRASH!  
  
Mohammed-No I have little pieces of shit in me! Get it off !!! get it off!!! WAAAAAA!!  
  
???-So.Mohammed, uh.. can I call you mo?  
  
Mohammed- No  
  
???- ok Mo, how.  
  
Mohammed- I said no you moldy sorry excuse for a breakfast meal thing!  
  
???-I don't care! This is my turf now. Not so tough now huh? The name's Fredric Jason Waffle the Third, but you can call me. DUH DA DUMM!!!!  
  
Mo- No need for the crappy theme song there buddy.  
  
???-DR. WAFFLE!!! FWA DOUBLE HA HA HA ! ("Fwa double ha ha ha" is a registered trademark of me so don't use it k? Or I will seek you down, and eat your flesh with a salty stick!)  
  
Dr. Waffle(Dr. from now on)- Well, now that you are here, I might as well show you the ropes. Ok , if someone wants a Rice Crispies Treat bar with chocolate chunks in it.  
  
Mo- It looks like it came out of my dogs ass this morning..  
  
Dr.- You don't have a dog.  
  
Mo- How di.  
  
Dr.- No need to ask, ill tell you I know everything about anything that exists in this world, and there is nothing you can do to try to stop me from seeing into you. ANYWAY, Mo,  
  
Mo- Don't call me that  
  
Dr- I can, and you can't stop me, so.. I think I will. K? If someone wants to eat you, they will insert 60 cents, press A,3 and you will leave us and then become a piece of shit just like the chunks in your stomach there, and I hope you get hurt falling down. In here, 4 feet can seem like 10 stories! Happy Trails little buddy! Well no. hey here comes someone now.. I hope he is hungry!  
  
Mo- STOP CALLING ME MO ITS MOHAMMED YOU IDIOT!!!  
  
Dr.- How about..no 


	2. CHAPTER2

Janitor- mmm. M&M's I love M&M's.. hmm.. 50 cents huh. okey dokey smokey..  
  
Dr-Hey.HEY!! Sumo wrong stage! This is stage 34, you want #28!!  
  
Sumo-No I don't! im on my snack break, and I want rice crispies treat with coco chips! I want chocolate.  
  
Mo- .Um are you sure about that? don't you want some hot fries or.. M&M's?  
  
Sumo-No me want rice crispies. now where did I put that 60 cents?  
  
Sumo-(still chewing) ooks ike shit, ut.. Astes ike coco..(GULP) mmmm.  
  
Dr.-Thank you sumo! For you have saved me from the devil spirit, Mohammed, hmmm. I will tweak the system, and give you 1 free snack a day for your efforts  
  
Sumo- thanks a lio, but I don't think my stomach agrees with evil spirits too well, I have to barf..  
  
Dr-ek.well don't do it..  
  
Sumo-BLARGH - COUGH - ahhhh much better  
  
Dr- ewww.. youre scaring away the costomers..Oh great now look what you did here comes the janitor.. AND HE HAS HIS MOP CART !!!! AHHHHH!!!  
  
Sumo-so what, a mop cart, what is that gonna do?  
  
Dr.- its not the cart, it's the TV On the cart. Like I explained earlier, that creates a worm hole loop, and makes us the size of.well..you. And the effect doesn't go away on Twinkies.{(I don't own "Hostess" just to clear things up)} last time we had one that called himself "Twinky man" Eh.it wasn't pretty, then he got the other 3 Twinkies to wear capes and hop around Just like him. I hope they were eaten or destroyed by now. But they probably weren't cause they have an EXTREMEY well developed persistence..  
  
Janitor-This puke needs some cleanin and since the kids are gone, ill watch BAYWATCH!! Yeah!  
  
Dr- horny little bastard. No not the TV!! ACK!!1  
  
???-This looks like a job for.TWINKY MAN!!!  
  
Dr.-NOT AGAIN!  
  
{(what will come of this so called "Twinky Man"? And what will our Square friend with little tinier squares in him .man.do next? Find out in the next chapter of .THE ADVENTURES OF DOCTOR WAFFLE!!! [echo..echo.] 


	3. CHAPTER3

Twinkie Man- Immm.. TWINKIE MAN!!!!  
  
Twinkie Man 2- NO! You lie! I an Twinkie man!  
  
Twinkie Man- Shut the hell up you overgrown, cream filled pastry! You are. umm..  
  
Twinkie Man- Ohhh yeah.. (Clears thought) TWINKIE MAN? WHAT THE fudge!!?? THIS IS BULL crap!! WERE YOU LISTENING, AND IF YOU WERE , WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING!!??  
  
Twinkie man 3- that..umm.Im. Twinkie man?  
Maybe? Twinkie Man- um WRONG! Listen, I am Twinkie man. since I came outta the TV first., he is Twinkie guy.  
  
Twinkie guy- .hi.  
  
Twinkie man-.. He is twinkie guy,  
  
Twinkie Guy- .h.  
  
Twinkie Man-DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT!!!!!!!  
  
Twinkie Guy- sorry  
  
Twinkie man- and you are twinkie boy! Got IT???  
  
Twinkie Boy- no. Twinkie man- GOOD !!!!  
  
Sumo-MMMmmm.. Twinkies.. My fav OR ATE.. !! ACHUMMMGLARB.. Gulp. yummy!  
  
Sumo- Uh. wheres the cream filling?  
  
Sumo- Now THAT'S the stuff! **{([copyright "Hostess"])}**  
  
All- . . . .  
  
Sumo- WHAT?  
  
MEANWHILE in the boiler room  
  
Dr. Waffle- Is it over? PLEASE GOD let it be over! Cause if it isn't over im gonna . well just sit here, and go stale. Wait hold on.  
  
Dr. Waffle- hmmm.. best if eaten by April 19...74???? 


	4. CHAPTER4

Dr.- Okay. I have been stale for about 25 years now. Is it getting hot in here..or is it just me?[looks at door sign] "mooR relioB". hrm. Uh. Oh Boiler Boom. That explains the heat but just how am I gonna get outta here?  
  
[Dr. Waffle starts to walk around examining all the age-old heating equipment from the ancient high school's boiler room. Then out of nowhere something falls form the ceiling not to far from where he is standing]  
  
Dr.- What the hell was that? [He walks over to a thing] Hrm.. body of a dog. head of a fox. yellow mane and tail, ..red body.. interesting.  
  
[The Doc examines it for a moment and then carefully pets it on its paw]  
  
Its warm.. too warm.. I should take this thing to the vet's office immediately! But the door is locked. And I am a mutated, 30 year old breakfast food. No problem, ill just put on some jeans, this white lab coat thing over here, and, viola! I look.. nearly human. apart from my lack of fingers, and waffle stamped chest..  
  
[The Doc picks up the creature, and lays it near the door. He then sits and ponders about his escape. But as he does, he slowly drifts asleep right next to the unconscious animal.]  
  
~~{[(In Dr. Waffle's Dream)]}~~  
  
[Three kids are running. Two boys, one girl. It looks like an anime cartoon of some sort. One boy in the middle of the three.. has a red hat and is carrying what looks to be like a yellow, fat, mouse. The three continue running. They stop when they are confronted by the same animal that fell from the Boiler room ceiling. The animal rears back, opens its mouth, and when it lands, The Doc wakes up]  
  
Dr.-YAWWWNNNnn. ugh.. what does it all mean?  
  
[He reaches for the creature, but it is gone]  
  
-Hello?  
  
[The strange animal is sitting like a dog right in front of him, with a slightly cocked head. (almost like a stupefied beagle) It rears back just like in his dream.. and it takes a deep breath. This time it lands and just as it begins to exhale, Dr. Waffle wakes up ... again.]  
  
Dr- AHHH! I hate double dreams.  
  
[he jerks into a sitting up position, and notices that the animal is calmly sleeping next to him. He lets out a long sigh of relief and goes back to sleep] 


	5. CHAPTER5

Dr.- AHHHHH1 Get it off me! Get it off!!..er? What? I am like SOPPOSED to be dead now. but.. uh..  
  
Dr.- Uh. Hi? Oh no.. NO plea-  
  
~SHLUUURRPP!!~  
  
Animal- FLAAAARREEE!!  
  
Dr.- Ha..haaa. that's.that's disgusting..ehh..(wipes the saliva off his face with the back of his hand) yeah.hey..i kinda like you..Im gonna have to name you something though.. Lets see.. I am a Waffle.. uh, mutated, of course, and you are a.. well.. a dog, slash cat, slash warm-thing.. HEY! COOL! (feels his pocket) I found a.. spoonfork. No wait. (reads the engraving on the back of the handle) a spork? ?!!!! THAT'S PERFECT! Ill name you. spork the dog, slash cat, slash warm thin-  
  
~BEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!!~  
  
Dr.- Now where did I hear that before? !! The school bell!! But shouldn't it be a ring? Anyway.. this means people .and Bob ,the janitor..  
  
Dr.-Spork? Where did you go  
  
Spork- Eeon!  
  
Dr- oh there you are- (the ground starts to shake violently) 


	6. CHAPTER6

Chapter 7 BIG LONG WORDS  
  
I was supposed to use really big, mind boggling, confusing as hell words that would mean something really small despite the 16 syllables...BUT I'm feeling too freaking lazy! so I wont!  
  
Dr.Waffle- Yeah, I really don't think so.  
  
Prof. Lemon- Oops. Well, that wasn't expected, but it worked!  
  
Kid- I GOT DEAD! (fwomph)  
  
Dr.Waffle- Riiight.. anyway.. would this be successful on me?  
  
Prof. Lemon- Its worth a try eh? But. uh.you aren't exactly a pokemon. this SHOULD turn you into your normal state.  
  
Dr.Waffle- SHOULD!? NORMAL!? What the hell do you mean normal!? You little asshole! My normal state is in a vending machine wrapped in plastic, with a spork, and a package of syrup! If you return me to normal, I wont be able to walk or talk or be annoying. or happy.  
  
Prof. Lemon- GOOD!  
  
Dr.Waffle- (inside the cramped pokeball) Oh my god. you son of a BIOTCH!  
  
Prof. Lemon- Well, THAT was unexpected.  
  
Dr.Waffle- You JACKASS! I am going to HURT you so BAD that you are gonna. uh. hold on a sec here. FEEL PAIN! LOTS AND LOTS OF PAIN!  
  
Prof. Lemon- (weeping, shuddering, shaking, wetting himself.) B.b.but you're back t-to n-n-nor-m-mal.  
  
Dr.Waffle- Oh yeah! Huh. Well whaddaya know? Well, I have the Biggest creak in my neck. AND IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!  
  
Prof. Lemon- I can fix that!  
  
Dr.Waffle- Thanks! But you know. this doesn't change anything.  
  
Prof. Lemon- Whatever do you mean?  
  
I'm STILL gonna kill you.  
  
Prof. Lemon- AAHHHHHHhhhhh.. runaway!...  
  
Kids are So gullable nowa days.Now then, where did Spork run off to? SPOOOORRRK! 


End file.
